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Die Laughing (over 16s only)

Here's the deal. WE LOVE TO LAUGH.

Fans of the Dungeon know this, and often tell us the worst jokes you have ever heard. We are hoping you can do better...

Get published by The Dungeon

What's that? You have an amazing joke? Tell us. Tell us now. We'll spread the best jokes we get here via Facebook, Twitter and our steam-powered but valuable email newsletter. We'll even put your name next to it!

Of course you appreciate that we can't use all jokes, but that doesn't mean that we don't like the rude ones. We're people too... albeit despots, torturers and dung sanitation experts etc.

A few to get you started... but we know you can do better!

These are the 10 most recent jokes. See full archive here.

A man walks into a bar with a piece of Tarmac under his arm,
The batman says what can I get you ?
The man replies a pint of larger please and make it one more for the road !

Jane

A jump lead walks into a bar, the batman says ill serve you, but you'd better not start anything !

Jane

What do you call a nun in a wheelchair?
Virgin Mobile.

Robyn

Why did Henry VIII have so many wives?
He liked to chop and change

Holly

Q.Why did the skeleton burp?

A.Because he didn't have the guts to fart!

Harriet

Dr dr I have a piece of lettuce growing out of my bottom,
Ohh dear I'm afraid that's just the tip of the iceberg!

Jane again

A man goes to a construction site and asks have they any jobs going ?
The foreman says well can you make tea ?
The man replies yes ?
Foreman says can you drive a forklift truck,
The man replies why how big is your teapot ?

Jane

Why do ghosts like to ride in elevators??

It raises their spirits.

Kirsty

A man walks into Tesco and picks up a ribeana , and a bag of sugar.
The man pays for the ribeana but walks out with the sugar.
when the alarm beeps, the security guard asks the man, why did he steal the sugar?
the confused man replies...
"Eh on the back of the ribeana it said 'sugar free'."

Nicole

What's a haunted chicken called ?
A poultry geist

Jane

See full joke archive.

Can you do better?

Let's hope so! Go on... bring us the FUNNY.
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“My friend and I travelled an hour and a half on the train on the 8th of April, just to go to the dungeons. We'd never been before but just decided it would be something different to experience. When we arrived and had an hour until our show time we sat at the south bank admiring the thames and watching the London eye. Little did we know we would be riding alone the dungeons very own Thames upon travelling down in the elevator and entering the dungeon..
And what a fantastic experience it was! From the minute we walked through the door we were petrified not knowing what to expect, we even had a little girl laughing at us and calling us "the two wimpy women of the London dungeons".
The scene is set spectacularly and the music and smell just top it off. Every sense comes alive, making fear of the unexpected take its toll as you board the boat, and take a pitch black ride deeper into the dungeons.
Not only was the tour scary at times, (eg in the bar when the ripper comes back to strike again) but hilarious! The actors are brilliant, and tell such funny jokes; I was in stitches right the way through - but not just because of the jokes, I was picked on by the doctor who put me under anaesthetic to remove my bits haha!
My friend got locked in prison, and threatened with thumb screws - I loved how much the actors got us involved.
I learned so much about londons history, and I've been telling everyone I know to go to the dungeons.
We had a guest on our tour who was in a mobility scooter and it was great to see how helpful all of the staff where in helping her get around to ensure she didnt miss a thing.
All in all a fantastic experience and we will be making the journey again! I can't wait to come back.
Educational, frightful and funny brilliance :)”

Christle See more reviews...